I often wonder,…

If the Pirates of Penzance were alive today…

Do you think they would do pilaties?…

I do…

But then they had panache…

The day my family was having our Reunion back East,…   That’s the direction that doesn’t lead you into the Pacific Ocean…  The day of the reunion I was sitting there watching ‘Fatal Attraction’ in HD…

And this made me think, “Example of Symmetry?  OR Newton’s Third Law?”

You Make the Call…

Since my brother was there and ‘on the field’ as it were, I asked him to officiate for me…

His return text was a bit disturbing,…  his judgment call was that it was more in line with Symmetry, apparently things got pretty rough around the “buffet area”…

But in our defense we are all pretty damned good cooks…

Mel Gibson and Dave Chappelle have been spending so much time together their crazy has synced up like two girls menses…

Who knew,…  I guess Catholics and Muslims CAN work together…   I mean it’s to hate Jews, other blacks, airline pilots and in flight lavatories but it’s a start…

Be sure to look over here citizenry, there is nothing to see under the Gulf over there…  Tap your oily slippers together and you’ll be right home…

Thank you TMZ for covering the crucial issues and bringing them to the forefront of public awareness…

Reporters annoy me…

If Michael Jackson ODing is a TRAGEDY, what do I call the junkie who pukes all over the baked goods at Safeway?…  Sublime?…

I mean who really cares that it’s been 1 year since Michael Jackson “tragically’ OD’ed?…  Personally I consider any day a pedophile junkie OD’s to be a pretty GOOD day…

I mean I’m not going to commemorate it every year but I’m not going to mourn it a year later either…  Maybe that’s what makes me a good Dad, I don’t rape my kids or their friends and I rarely OD around the house…

Erin Grey (of TV’s Buck Rogers and the 25th Century fame) has died…

I know I was totally shocked and saddened… Until I found out it was a false internet rumor…

I met her once at a SciFi convention in Orlando…

She gave me a hand job PLUS an autographed photo,…

for only $15 extra she wore the jumpsuit…

I don’t really care about all this hype over the Lost Finale…

I watched this show when it was on originally, it’s just been updated, repackaged and re-sold as original programming but it’s a re-make, it’s just un-original writing…

I’ve never watched the current one but as far as the old one goes let me just say this, had those survivors just gotten together with military precision and SHOT that Gilligan those poor people would have been off that island within a week…

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