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There have been many people over the years who thought they’d “taken care of me”.

I’m a pacifist, but the worst thing you can do is attack me. I don’t start shit I end it, I won’t just be beaten I defend myself. Being a pacifist doesn’t mean you’re weak or afraid as some people like to think.

There is some dialogue I heard recently from ‘John Wick’ of all places which sums me up pretty nicely.

“…is a man of focus. Commitment. Sheer will. Something you know very little about.”

Several friends of mine over the years have seen me do things like I’m doing now, regarding my weight & restoring my life to my own. I love those people & would normally tag them here but I don’t want to embarrass them or pull them into a public post (if they feel like it they can always comment) & they’ve stuck with me for 25+ years. Others for less but they mean just as much to me as well.

It’s shocking to some to see me come out of these funks, admittedly I allowed the actions of others to keep me down for far too long, usually they were only of about 6mos. in duration. I thought I was doing the best thing for my sons but realize I should have broken that pattern far sooner.

This metamorphosis is amazing to many but it is something anyone can do, the reason I can do it is because I know. I’ve done it before & want to do it again for the last time. You have the will, just engage your mind. Push yourself further every day, do your own “2 extra for the boys” of everything.

I apologize to all of you for letting myself go for so long. It will never happen again I assure you.

DQYD will be returning soon!

-Love Ed.

#DreamFunny


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I recently started studying Aikido again…  at Chucky Chi’s….

It’s not too bad getting back into it, but the new sensei/owner is…  Well I don’t know how to describe it he’s just kind of vermin…

you know, a rat…


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Don’t ‘blog angry’ folks, find and feel your ki….  I feel somewhat repentant for a recent exchange….

But then again I really don’t…  I mean Mr. Thorn’s 2nd post just started off with an inflammatory statement meant to elicit an emotional response….  Unfortunately, for him, I hold the microphone here and he caught me ‘in a mood’…  He could be a really great guy, who knows?…  The people who see him day to day and face to face, just like the rest of us…

Just for future edification, when I reply in bold as I did to this gentleman’s first posted comment, it doesn’t mean I’m angry…  I’m just distinguishing my response from your comment….

I wasn’t even annoyed at his first comment, I was just trying to lead him to another joke which already had links to the facts and ideas I was citing… But I guess when he decided to be confrontational in his first sentence of his second comment, that damned Ranger training reflex kicked in….  ‘Crush throat, recon situation later’….

I’m just not going to research and post the same links to the same facts multiple times, I have a day job…  I’m just lucky that I get to do it from home for the most part…  But I also figure you folks out there’s time is just as valuable as mine!!!!

So that’s why I link stuff that I’ve already written about previously, to give you the entire process of the particular thought I may be writing about, especially for new readers who don’t realize I have expressed a thought about the issue earlier…..

I figure if your interested enough to comment, your interested enough to make sure you have all the facts, but I’m a nut that way…

Anyway, this one probably won’t be on the ‘live feed’ for too long as it’s really just not funny…  But it’s not meant to be…  What’s really funny is it’s all over a ‘throw away’ joke, it was all about an online visual image, which can’t even be used in my stand up…


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I’m not massively into reality show’s, though I do like the Amazing Race series….  but it’s more of a game show to me.  Some of the chef one’s are great, but that’s because it’s always nice to see Gordon Ramsey really shred up some lamer who can’t even dice lettuce, yet want’s to run a half million dollar business…  Yeah, your the comic relief,…  the guy in the red shirt who beams down….  Your dead in the first 4 weeks, quit applying to the shows please…  No one is going to remember you on the ‘reality road tour’…

But some of these make me think of ideas for other reality shows that I think would be great for the next writers strike, so I wanna get the ideas published now…  See you in court.

The Last Sinner Standing: Basically you build a nice big stadium, mount plenty of hidden cameras and you do that sucker up Roman style….  It was public domain for all those years, till right now… Too late bitches!…  We’d also have web coverage and charge people $9.95 per month to watch nothing, ala Big Brother…

Milf Nannies Japanese Banzai Game Show: I assume this one pretty much sells itself and needs no explaination.

Steven Seagal Explains String Theory: Steven Seagal and 42 bad actors are locked in a cabin in Alaska with only whale blubber and mead for 90 days, while Steven explains String Theory and his environmental beliefs.  The whale blubber being, in addition to sustenance, the only source of light AND heat.

After exiting the last actor standing who can accurately explain String Theory (as explained by Mr. Seagal) to an 8th grade Science class, WITHOUT shattering more than 10 wrists, elbow or knee joints combined, wins $50,000 dollars and a chance to tour with Steven sharing a double occupancy room at Super 8 for 18 months to promote this project and anything else that strikes his whimsey.

Look for more exciting television ideas in the future….


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Guilt and regret are a waste of your time….  People probably think that’s a little self involved but then isn’t everything???   I mean your not really living your life for someone else are you….  EVERYTHING you do is self involved, even if it’s taking care of your own elves (kids)….  I mean you are the reason they’re here after all, you were so self involved you refused to put on a condom or at least allowed her to talk you OUT of wearing one, either way…  Self involved….

I have 3 kids, though honestly one of them was only mine briefly….  If there was anything I was going to regret it would have been not getting to see her more often….   But then divorce, military service, geography and the financial constraints of the world had a great deal to do with that as well, I mean I still had to make a living right?….  Anyway, she’s an adult now and doing fine on her own….  And I get to talk to her quite a bit now so that’s a bonus!

My other two boys are both still in their ‘little people’ fazes…..  One of them will be forever actually….  My older son has Down Syndrome, which freaks some people out…..  Let me give you a little tip, he’s just like you….  Only nicer….  The kids life is honestly golden, he’s what medical professionals call ‘high functioning’….   They used the same phrase in reference to me on occasion, but I think it had a different connotation in that situation as they also stated I was ‘manipulative’ (again who isn’t?)….  He’s constantly on a quest to make people laugh and then he’ll query, “Am I funny?”….   We’re still trying to figure out where he gets that from….

The kids a little flirt too, he runs right up to women (only the good looking ones mind you, he’s got Down Syndrome, he’s not stupid) and will start hugging them simply because he KNOWS he can get away with it….  Honestly, I’d do the same, if I thought I had a chance in hell of being allowed to do so…

I think, if I was going to have a regret in my life, it would be that I’m not going to be able to be there and protect him from the lame stupidity of Jr. High School and High School, as he’s started the former this year….  So I’ve done the next best thing….  Since he was about 3 I’ve been teaching him basic Aikido….  Some of you may think this is not a good idea, but you’d be WRONG….   When he was 5 some little punk 7 year old thought it would be funny to push him around on the playground….  That’s when my little man threw the penis wrinkle into a fence and bloodied his nose…. He’s 12 now and has a lot more throwing power, in addition to some really good wrist locks, so some of those Jr. High kids should REALLY fly….

I’ve gotta admit, that was an EXCEPTIONALLY FUN DAY though….   See they decided since he couldn’t recount the story to them that he must have started it….  I remember going in there and talking to him, once I was able to cobble together the true story and get the little turd ball that started it to admit he started it….  I really enjoyed berating the neophytes that administered that little school….  Plus the other kid’s Dad just looked totally flummoxed once he realized his little prince was a crap bag fop and got his ass kicked by a special needs child to boot!….  I bet that kid got REAMED when he got in the car away from everyone else, but who cares he deserved it….   I bought my son ice cream on the way home!

Son #2 is just like any other kid who’s father has been explaining the finer points of String Theory and Particle Physics to him since he was 3….  Poor kid asks about a star and gets a 20 minute lecture….  But he GETS it….  It’s nice when you can sit down and watch a program about dark matter and black holes with an 8 year old and he ENJOYS IT!!!….  He’s been on the Aikido program since 3 too, but luckily for him he’s never had to use it, it would be rare but nice if he never did but I truly doubt that….  Sure we’ve moved away from the majority of the moronic and racist contingent in this country, by relocating as far away from the south as possible while not moving to a different continent but as I’ve learned in my own life, STUPID IS UNIVERSAL…..  I’m sure his day is coming but he’s better prepared than I was at his age for it….

I don’t do regret, but now that they’ve started a new school year I’m missing having my boys around the house a bit….  Sure it makes it hard to code when they’re here but I’m an insomniac anyway so it’s not like I wouldn’t be up at 2am in any event…..   Getting distracted by them in the daylight just gives me something to work on in the moonlight.


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